I spend a lot of time thinking about thankfulness. And talking about it. And saying that I need ot do more of it. But I started reading this book that might be helpoing me really GET thankfulness to God for the first time. It's called "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp.
I can say it's a life-changer, and I generally only feel that way about the works of T.S. Eliot and C.S. Lewis. And the funny thing is, one of my American students recommended it to me at the end of 2012.
At the time, there was no way I was going to follow through on her recommendation. I was preparing myself for a life in Korea, I was teaching several writing and literature classes, and I had a side job reviewing books. I had been a book reviewer for a couple of years, so I was more than a little stuck-up regarding my taste in books.
I Have A MASTERS in Literature, Love. I Know All the Things.
How could this 16-year-old, no matter how smart, possibly have landed on a Christian non-fiction book that would in any way meet my rigorous standards for reading material? Add to that, I was kind of burned out on Christian non-fiction books, which (in 2012) seemed to me to be fairly juvenile. I had read the Bible myself over a dozen times, and was certainly not expecting to garner any new spiritual insights from coffee-table books.
Meaning, I was smug. And self-important and unteachable.
And I'm glad I stumbled across this book on Scribd (a reading app on my computer), because it really taught me how to love God through thankfulness.
Part of the premise of the book is that the act of thanking God is the act of stepping into his presence. We get closer, we repair the relationship when we recognize his gifts and thank him for them. It's worshiping him. And we miss how many times in the Bible that thanks are given--Jesus gives thanks before multiplying bread (thankfulness and miracles are connected), and Daniel's strong prayers in the Old Testament were a thrice-daily giving of thanks.
And you have to be specific. I've spent many a year saying in my heart and out loud, "And thanks, God, for everything." Everything is too big a thing to focus on. You can't feel gratitude over everything. Like how one death is a tragedy and a million deaths is a statistic, my so-called appreciation of God's blessings is almost non-existent if I'm not noticing things on the individual level.
A friend of the author's dared her to write a list of 1,000 things she really loved. You could easily write a list of 10 things or even a 100, but a 1,000 sounds huge. Yet, she began making a list and now, so have I.
At first, I wondered whether "things I love," however inconsequential, really qualified as blessings. But, oh. I'd forgotten the very obvious verse saying, "Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." (James 1:17).
In the act of writing down every much-adored thing, you see how much God loves you. He sent that thing to you. He knew you would need it.
So I'm writing down at least 10 every day, no matter how simple, and I can already feel my heart opening more to receive God's love. It's all around and we worry and resent and just don't SEE it, right there. But I'm training to see. God is training me.
First list of 10 things:
1. Deep pillows and puffy comforters in hotels.
2. My own bed (Korean or American) after long travels.
3. Taster's Choice instant coffee, piled deep in the cup,
sent from my mother.
4. Nutella milkshakes, smooth and rare--taken once a season
at You Are Here Cafe.
5. Friends who know more than I do (about art. Architecture,
language, anything).
6. Perfect pink lipstick and red gloss, a bright spot on my
face.
7. Sunlight streaming into Seoul station in the morning; all
of us on our way somewhere new.
8. Brunches. Such a feminine thing to do. The wide array of
things you can eat, the conversations you can share with your friend.
9. Places to sit quietly and lay down your burdens when your
back and arms are tired.
10. The white ruffle at the bottom of my brown sweater,
which turns it into a dress and which always shows under my coat.
2-25-15
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